Sunday, October 5, 2014


Grating End

I grit my teeth and grated on you
You bashed ‘my’ ear with your tone
and your melancholy rings in it
tap dancing in my brain like horrid
pesty little children
We peered between the cracks
 too scared to go between
A circle of filth unraveled 
A stench unwarranted


We became masters of deceit.
We watered the seed of discontent
unconsciously out pouring decay
We closed the gate to pure and meaning
Chaos ensued and we danced in its charm
justifying our reckless selves
We rolled around in the dirty mud of it
like pigs in dirt, full of glee
but ready for the slaughter
Take hold of another day
and cover it with slime
We created a circle of filth
a stench unwarranted
We shot bullets of despair
no armour to protect
We shot at each other like
one shoots at the enemy
to save themselves
Your pieces were falling
off and exploding on me
The flames you threw at me
burned and scolded my heaviness
A sunken me
and a sunken you
and it was the end
Arms out-stretched to an empty receiving

we said goodbye and good riddance

Calico Walls

Hard to wait
calico walls
white light
bright around shadow fallen faces
eyes empty waiting in silence
it’s a waiting for now
grey and burgundy carpeted intrusion to my system
the receptionists are friendly
smiling voices, buzzing business for them
a drone of  numb for the seated rest
empty eyes embrace the brightness
of the cold room
I try to forget the grim reaper
who seeps his teeth into my calm
and shocks my thumping heart
I sit with my imaginings 
vividness of dying organs wretched and ravaged
havoc wreaked in multitudes, rotten happenings
a killing monster growing, a pulling I have no hold on
a sickening perceiving
multiplication of dread creatures devouring the soft pinkness
thumping veins blister and squeal and shriek
and twist to a dance of gun fire blazing battlefield
pulsing things cower in corners,
no shelter from the devil of disease shooting arrows at them

and I wish to the clouded sky above that I could delve inside
and shield his carriage and rid the killing monsters
but I can’t do it
the rotten riddling devours his machine
the fire is within
It’s burning has began 

I sit 
I wait 
Calico walls 


Bench

Street cold
Life cold
Street wet
Life wet
Street hard
Life hard
Street cruel
Life cruel
Street tough
Life tough
Street bound
Life bound
I cower in corners
So as not to be seen
But even if I stood right in front of you
You do not see me still
Life bound

Street bound
The child

Down
down
down
deep down
inside the dirt
dirt surrounding
long
big black hole
eternity
and ending
down, down
down, down
deep down
6 ft down
a heavy feather
swaying in the blackness
swaying left to right
down, down
deep
we bury the child
we block the sun
and wither in the blackness
and sway
to the sound
endless black calm
bury the child
the child
gone
down, down
the dirt and shelter
dirt
black
deep
down
and the sun turns
cold
and the dirt

becomes eternity
The Ocean and You

Today when I look at the ocean
I have to tell myself not to think
of you
Today when I walk the sand
that seeps
and sinks me in
I try not to think
of you
Today when the sun glistens
on the sea salt sprayed rocks,
I have to be careful upon the climb
I try not to slip
And as they gently rock beneath my feet
I know it will be okay to fall
on the warm sand that will catch me
And as I trust in the warmth
so I trust
in the knowing of you


Part two

Like the cruel sea
I witness before me
Its crashing splendor
I am reminded
It’s a beauty I want to reach for
with a child like yearning
but I must not get devoured
by the crashing waves

I must not drown
 Mr Broken

I have met you before
Here goes the rollercoaster
Ready, set, go
I don’t think I want to take this ride
The pained look you present to me
What shall I do with it?
Broken
Don’t give me your excuses
If I give you unconditional support
And it makes you falter
If it’s too hard to take
Turns you into a liar
You lie to yourself
You forget yourself
Truth becomes ugly
If knowing me is too much
Then go be broken elsewhere
I don’t need your tainted pieces
She can have them



Thursday, October 2, 2014

Ravage


You scurried
Away
A scared little mouse
You gnawed at me for a small while
You devoured my bits
You devilishly relished
And before I could take a breath
And before I could awake
to the small massacre taking place
You scurried away
And now you leave just bits
Lost scurried bits
Empty bits of me
But you full to the brim
and delighted

A devilish little mouse

RAT
You gnawed at me for a long while
A devilish little mouse
You devoured my bits
You devilishly relished
Perfectly in sight
Yet unseen to an
unlooking eye
the onlookers marveled at your
cute little ways
I foolishly ignored
the trappings
Suddenly I was awoken
to the small massacre taking place
I stirred 
You scurried away
And now you leave just bits
Lost scurried bits
Empty bits of me
But you full to the brim
and delighted,
unaware of your
greedy, gluttonous, gorging
and the little savage that you are
Don’t come again
Ever again
To this house
Once yours and you were the king

Now I will shut the trap hard
And wont let you,
Scatheless
Leave, with glory
You brute
Beware, the little mouse
More a rat
Good riddance

Heavy Days


I drag through the mud puddles
with heavy feet
i rummage through
i kick the dust
it flies into the sphere
I wait for dry
Heavy gravel
my ankles heavy
i kick it to the curb 
i wipe the grit
i wipe away the heavy
i wipe away the sinking
i choose instead
the easy flow
of the hard ground 
In the hard dirt of this hardness
do not the leaves of the majestic grow
to show me the lightness that is

Just begin

It is in you
the sun that i see
the blinding wonderment
I squint and stare
It is in you
the winded circling leaves
chase them as they dance around
It is in you 
the feverish glint
the wise wondering 
the need to do it
the need to dance to the beat
of the heat you feel deep
and within
Rub your squinted sun burned lashes
open your soul 
take in the sun and the wind and the fever for it
and just begin